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Friday, December 11, 2009

Grief Education

The loss of a loved one can take it's toll on you both physically and mentally.You may experience a rollercoaster of emotions. One moment may find you incapacited by grief,whereas in the next you may feel almost normal. Anger,fear,guilt,and panic are just a few of the emotions you may experience.This is completely normal.

The physical effects of grief can include sleepesness,excessive fatigue,headaches,general malaise,intestinal upsets,and dizziness.During periods of extreme stress such as grief,it is crucial that you try to eat regulary and to rest,since stress can suppress your immune system,making you more prone to illness.

Your grief reaction and subsequent recovery can depend on the qualiy of your relationship to the deaceased,your caspacity to handle stress,and the type of support network that you have.If your relationship was strained or you have never experienced the loss of a loved one,your grief may be overwhelming.

Do not be afraid to seek the support of friends and family.They will want to help but might not be sure how.All too often,those who are grieving keep their feelings to themselves and feel that others will be able to anticipate their needs.As difficult as it may seem,it may be necessary for you to take the initiative.

Talk to your funeral director.Funeral directors are listeners,advisors,and supporters.They assist those who are grieving every day. Many funeral homes offer aftercare programs,which are programs designed to help you through the initial stages of grief.

Your funeral director can also recommend local support groups and reading materials that can help you understand and cope with your grief.Even if yo weren't directly involved with the funeral arrangements,you can contact a funeral home.Family funeral homes are committed to the communities they serve and willingly help those in need.

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Coping with Grief during the Holiday

Halloween barely passes before stores stock their shelves with holiday decorations. Christmas carols echo through shopping malls,and the first of the holiday commercials hits the airwaves. If you've lost a loved one, these can be stark reminders that the holidays won't be the same.

Whether your loved one died recently or decades ago, the holidays bring forth powerful memories that may trigger your grief. If the person died on or near a holiday, the two events are forever linked and may be particularly painful,especially if you have unresolved feelings about the lost relationship.

When trying to cope with grieve, It's important to understand that grief is cumulative. We don't experience a loss,move through the emotional stage,then emerge on the other side. Grief is like adding rocks into a backpack. Each loss, whether it's death,divorce or a move away from family and friends, is packed in like another rock; some bigger than others. When grief is unresolved, one of these emotional rocks may come tumbling out of the backpack when we least expect it. It may come out inappropriately, in the form of road rage,substance abuse or lashing out verbally or physically.

This holiday season, if the first christmas card you open it rips a rock from your backpack,use that opportunity to work through your feelings. Don't just shove it back in the pack. Here are some tips to help you cope.

Do:
.Expect to have some pain.When the feelings come,let them.
.Accept a few invitations to be with close family and friends.choose the ones that sound most appealing at the time and avoid the ones that feel more like obligation.
.Talk about your feelings.Let people know if you're having a tough day.
.Incorporate your loved one into the holidays.
.Share your favorite stories over dinner.
.Make a toast or light a candle in rememberance.
.Make a donation in his or her name.
.Help others:
Take a meal to a homebound couple.
Volunteer in a shelter or soup kitchen.
Adopt a family to buy presents or food for.
.Modify or make new traditions if it feels right.just remember to include others who are grieving,especially children, in the decision.
.If the idea of holiday shopping overwhelms you, buy gifts online or through catalogs.
.Replace negative thoughts with positive ones.
.Prepare yourself for January. Sometimes the after fact of the holidays can bring more sadness than the holidays themselves.

Don't:
.Don't hide your feelings from children in an effort to be strong for them or protect them. You'll only be teaching them to deny their own feelings.
.Don't isolate yourself.Although you may not feel much like celebrating,accept a few invitations.
.Don't accept every invitation or throw yourself into work in an effort to keep busy.
It may only add more stress.
.Don't expect to go through defined stages of grief. "Every person is different and every relationship is unique,
.Don't act as if your loved one never lived.
.Don't be afraid to cry. "Crying is like the valve on a pressure cooker.It lets the steam out.

If someone you know is grieving:

.Encourage him or her to talk about their feelings.Listen to them. 98% of people who have recently lost someone want to talk about the person who died.
.Let them cry.
.Don't pretend their loved one didn't die- it's okay to say the deceased's name.
.Don't say things like:
"At least their not suffering anymore"
"Their in a better place"
"I know you'll miss them"
"I know how you feel"

Resources:

Grief Recovery Institute
www.grief-recovery.com
(818) 907-9600
Holiday Hotline:(800) 445-4808

How to plan a funeral

Planning a funeral is something most of us will have to do at one point in our lives, but how do you do? Are you getting good value for your money? What do you really need?

There are two things to remember in planning a funeral. First, no one is going to charge you for asking questions. The second thing to remember is that you are in charge.

When a loved one dies,grieving family members and friends are often confronted with dozens of decisions about the funeral-all of which must be made quickly and often under great emotional duress. What kind of funeral should it be? What funeral home should you use? Should you bury or cremate the body,or donate it to science? What are you legally required to buy? What other arrangements should you plan? And as callous as it may sound, how much is it all going to cost?


There are two stages to arranging a funeral. In the first stage,work with your local funeral director to explore the options(you can also find information on this website.) Once you've made your choices and arranged the ceremony,the second step is to arrange the financing.


Planning a Funeral Ceremony

1. Determine the type of service.

.large or small ceremony
.Traditional ceremony or creative expression

Today,many families plan funerals that reflect the contributions accomplishments of the deceased.

2. Determine the final resting place. Do you want a cemetery plot? mausoleum?
Do you want to be cremated? If you choose cremation, what do you want done with your ashes?

Weighing the options in advance is better than making a rushed decision on this personal topic. What best fits your lifestyle and feelings?

With the help of your family-owned funeral home, funeral director, oyu can create a funeral that will be a personal and dignified tribute

Monday, December 7, 2009

Meaningful Funerals

A meaningful funeral is a personalized funeral,one that is a tribute to the life that's been lived, not the death that's occured. Families better cope with pain of death by involving themselves in the planning of meaningful tributes to their loved ones.When you are planning a funeral,personalizing the ceremony should be a priority. Think about the special qualities of the person who died and what he or she meant to others. consider his or her passions,hobbies,pastimes,likes,dislikes. How can you capture this unique life. Be as creative as you,together with your family,friends,funeral director,and the person who will lead the service,brainstorm how to remember and honor the person who died.

Funerals, How they help with grieving process

Funerals are an outward expression of the loss of a loved one. It adds ritual to the experience and can be personalized to express your family's beliefs and traditions.It can be a time of healing by bringing people together and allowing them to say goodbye to their loved one.

Sunday, December 6, 2009

Caskets

There are many different types of caskets and each one has it's unique features. A casket often is the single most expensive item you'll buy if you plan a traditional full service funeral. Caskets vary widely in style and price and sold primarily for their visual appeal. They are made up of metal,wood,fiber board, fiber glass, or plastic. Average casket cost can vary between $2,500.00 - $ 4,500.00 or as much as $10,000.00. We at P&H are here to help you find a casket that's best meets your family needs both emotional & financial.

Grieving the Loss of a Loved one

A profound sense of loss is felt at the death of a loved one,whether that death is sudden or expected. There is no set pattern to grief. Some people grieve for a short time while others may never fully recover from their loss.Some won't experience their grief until some time later. There is no one right way to grieve. As each of us is unique so too is our grief.

It is during these times that the support of friends and family is so important. Having a visitation,funeral,or memorial service is an important part of the grieving process and brings people together who can give you a support network.If that is not enough, your local community,religious organizations,and many healthcare organizations offer grief counseling or grief support groups.

Although it may be difficult to reach out to these groups at first,many have found grief support groups to be a place where one can continue to grieve openly with others who share their pain.

Don't forget about your funeral director.Many funeral homes also offer aftercare programs,which are programs to help you cope with the initial stages of the grieving process.

Your funeral director will also be able to refer you to local grief support organizations or counselors should you desire group or individual counseling. In addition to counseling programs,many funeral homes provide grief support packets with materials related to grief and the mourning process.

What to do when a relative dies?

If a death occurs in the middle of the night or on the weekend? A funeral Director at P&H FAMILEE FUNERAL SERVICES,Inc. is available 24 hours a day.

What are the benefits of pre-arranged funerals?

Peace of mind:
Many who have undergone the emotional strain of arranging a funeral within hours of losing a loved one have made the choice to pre-plan their own funeral. Doing so lifts the burden from their loved ones by relieving decision-making pressure at a time of grief and emotional stress.


Personal Choice
Funeral arrangements are a deeply personal choice. pre-planning provides you with the time needed to make practical, detailed decisions that reflect your standards,lifestyle,taste and budget and we assure you and your family that the choices you make will be carried out as planned.

Lower costs
When you finalize yor plan, We can advise you of the total cost. You do not have to set aside funda for your plan,but doing so protacts you against escalating funeral costs. By locking in today's funeral costs and ensuring that the necessary funds are set aside, You help relieve yourself of unnecessary future worry and your survivors of an unexpected expense.

Monday, November 30, 2009

What is professional service?

basic services of funeral director,staff,and overhead. it includes conducting the arrangement conference, planning the funeral, conslting with the family and clergy,shelter of the remains,coordanating with the cemetery,crematory, or other third parties.

How much does it cost for a basic funeral service?

any where between $7,000.00 and up.

If i was cremated can i be buried?

Yes

If i choose to be cremated, can i have a funeral?

Yes, cremation can take place either before or after a funeral depending on what type of service is selected. It is still possible to have a viewing, funeral service or burial.

What is a pall bearer?

Close friends or relatives of the deceased who carries the casket from the hearse to the church or other facility where the funeral is to be held. Being a pall bearer is a great honor.

What is a casket spray?

A Floral arrangement that's placed on top of the casket.

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Sunday, November 22, 2009

Why having insurance is so important?

So many family's are not prepared for death, when a family is strucken by death of a love one, they offen worry where the money is coming from. so the family have to all contribute or ask others for donations to pay for a love one's funeral expense. Insurance it not as expensive as people think, for insurance infomation please call or email us and we will set you up with a company that will work within your budget.

SPONSORS GO HERE

What is a cremation?

It's a less expensive way, of processing human remains to ashes.
Many people have questions to ask about death. Let's face it, It's not exactly a subject that many of us prefer to discuss. Death & dying has always been taboo subjects,and many go through life with wrong information. Tv & movies give us the wrong impression of how death should be dealt with. Death of a love one takes a great emotional toll on everyone. There are particular stages that everyone goes through to cope with their grief. The main reason for establishing this site is to educate people in the areas of death & dying. We have put together some asked questions,but if you have any questions that's not listed.Please fell free to call or email us. No question is too "stupid" to ask, so please ask away, All confidentiality will be respected.

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

As a good Funeral Director\ Embalmer
We often try to make every deceased individual look like them- selves, but many times depending on the cause of death and what the body has gone through. We always give our best efforts to present them with Dignity.

Sunday, November 8, 2009

CAN WE BUILD OUR OWN CASKET OR URN?

Absolutely; there is nothing more special than the loving care and touch
that a family puts in to building the casket or urn for their loved one.

WHAT HAPPENS TO THE BODY AFTER DEATH?

Once death takes place the body undergoes a number of changes,
if these changes are not stopped, they will lead to decomposition
of the body makeing it non- viewable for the family.
Rigor mortis Set's in 2 hours after death
depending on the temperature of the environment.

WHAT IS A FUNERAL ARRANGEMENT?

A formal meeting with a Funeral Director and family members who have been designted to make the basic decisions necessary in order to proceed, Usualy the next of kin to the decease or whom ever responsible for payment makes all decision.

WHAT DOES A FUNERAL DIRECTOR DO?

Funeral Directors are caregivers and administrators.
They make the arrangements for transportation of the body,
complete all necessary paperwork,and implement the choices made by the family regarding the funeral and final disposition of the body.
They coordinate with cemeries, clergy,florists newspapers,musicians
and other agencies. They also bathe and embalm the deceased, if necessary and prepare the body or viewing.

PRE- PLANNING ( The Reality of Loss)

The Gift of Love is taking the burden of planning a funeral away from your loved ones.
By planning in advance,You are able to take care of important details and decisions which would otherwise be made under the most adverse condition by your loved ones.
To make an intelligent decision about planning a funeral,
You need to know what services are availble and what they cost.
Planning ahead is very simple, Thousands of people in our community already enjoy peace of mind knowing their final wishes will be carried out by: P&H FAMILEE Funeral Services,Inc.

WHAT TO DO WHEN A DEATH OCCURS?

If a death occurs in the middle of the night or on the weekend
A Funeral Director at P&H FAMILEE Funeral Services, Inc.
is available 24 Hours a day, 7 days a week,
We will walk you through the entire process.
(773) 793-1367 *(773) 858-9669

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

What is an Obituary?

A brief biography of the deceased life.

Funeral Etiquette

Simple guidelines which pertains to funerals & other burial rituals. Common sense and have respect for the decease and their family.